I began this post yesterday, but put it aside for further contemplation, because, like her, I don't want to offend anyone. One's spiritual leanings can be a bit of a touchy subject. But here we all are together, a myriad of beliefs and ideals. There is room for us all, isn't there?
I was raised Baptist Christian, my mother moved us to a non-denominational church when I came into my teens and I left the church all together when I was about 16/17. Regardless of faith or lack thereof I have always followed my family's traditional holiday celebrations, which were pretty standard, I think. The first Saturday after Thanksgiving we would put up our tree and from then we would shop and decorate and bake and enjoy the usual merry makings of the season. Advent was never a part of this, solstice never observed nor the saint's days. And certain members of my family have always been pretty adamant that we follow our traditions, never deviating. Tradition is tradition, I suppose. And for some I can see how knowing what to expect year after year can seem comforting.
But, in recent years I had begun to feel a certain flatness, hard to put my finger on but I just wasn't feeling as fulfilled with our celebrations as usual. Tradition had come to feel restraining and stagnant and I begun to feel that my spirit wasn't being nourished by our festivities. But how does one without a set spiritual path bring spirit and a sense of the sacred into celebrations based on religion? For me, the Christmas season has always been about family and togetherness. About celebrating just for the sake of celebrating, shouldn't life be celebrated? But suddenly, that just did not feel like it was enough for me, though, I don't think I could have put this empty feeling, this yearning for a more sacred and spiritual holiday into words. I did know that the coming of the Christ child held little meaning for me (though, completely respecting that it does for so many) and so did the hustle and bustle of scurrying of gift giving and receiving.
So, this year the decorations will not be as many and are coming out more slowly. There is still much celebration to be had here, but the focus will be not on the material or the frenzy that builds over the season. Over the years I had amassed quite a collection of Christmas decorations and over the summer I gave most of them away, opting instead to make by hand most of what we put up and involve my children in this as much as possible. Too often children become spectators of these occasions and are only involved when something is to be received. Instead our aim will be the moment received, not the end result.